Discover the Gift of Shame

Hear Pietro’s Remarkable Healership Journey.

Click Below to Hear his 2 Part interview with Host Bill Mackie of Self-Discovery Radio:

PART 1: Self Discovery Radio Part 1

PART 2: Self Discovery Radio Part 2


In my childhood I was very sensitive around my height.

If someone actually voiced insult or derision around my height, I would sometimes feel devastated. I could not, in those times, authentically move beyond my shame to offer the comfort and re-assurance that it was okay – I was just fine and normal.

Instead, I would beat myself up, cursing myself for being born in this shape and form.

I replicated the abuse and shaming from others – towards myself.

As I was became more conscious I began to challenge and enact boundaries towards the self-deprecating and shaming behaviours.

I began to give assurance to myself, specifically to the part of myself who held that shame.

This form of self-care lasted years, until I came to the place where it no longer mattered what you or someone else believed to be physically abnormal.

Read: The Secret World of Platforms and Bells: A Personal Short Story.

shutterstock_67746313 - med

I now truly believe that abnormality as a concept does not have a place in our world.

I fervently know that the very fact that I have been born into this world gives me the right to be who and as I am.

By my mere presence, I have the right to exist.

Consequently, I am able to joke about myself and the physical limitations of my height.

In my lectures, I use my height, and my past struggles with it, and the process it has taken me through, as examples of the stages any issue travels through on the path towards consciousness.

This is my return to consciousness around my issue of my height, as a reflection and example of how I personalized my trauma growing up, of the self-conclusions I drew about myself from the family and societal issues I was exposed to. (Read: How Personalizing Creates Low Self-Esteem.)


What was the cost of my shame during those years? When I look back, I see a boy and a young man of low confidence, a situation that resulted in my being tentative and withholding in many areas of my life. Though I dearly wanted centre-stage, I rarely allowed myself to be in the full glow of attention – because I risked ridicule.

Thus, I missed out on key intimate relationships and opportunities in my music career.

The shame we feel towards ourselves results in costs and limitations in our everyday life.

Every child born holds a gift of uniqueness, a package of creativity that contains a skill, an idea, an invention or something that has the potential of adding to or benefiting our world.

Our shame – a part of us we send into exile and therefore exclude from our lives – is a package of creativity with a gift to offer ourselves and therefore the world in which we reside.

I have seen so many creative gifts emerge from people who have integrated their shame – their once exiled parts – into the mainstream of their emotional system.

I have seen such alignment produce people who have emerged as excellent organizers and planners of events, whereas hitherto they were grossly disorganized to the point of it being a struggle to get anything done.

images (9)

People who have discovered themselves to be gifted artists.

images (10)

Speakers who stand before a podium with the ability to entertain and hold the riveted attention of an audience.

images (13)

Those who developed an interest and later a skill in scientific research.

The list is long.

It is like living in a large house containing many rooms.

images (14)

When we integrate our shame we open the door to those once locked rooms.

Having never been exposed for a long time, we will likely have to clean out the rooms. But once aired and cleaned we can renovate and later decorate the room, and turn it into a nursery, a room to work on art, a den, a meditation room, a guest bedroom, a storage room – whatever we wish it to become. We can visit that room, and utilize it as we need to.

An integrated relationship with our once exiled shame opens up access to rooms in our inner houses that were once closed off to us.


images (15)

When we stop directing shame towards ourselves, the light of our consciousness illuminates a room that once held little or no light.

The humour we indulge in, the confidence in ourselves we now possess, the tears we shed in sympathy, the excitement and passion we feel is now authentic.

It is not fake, shallow, or manufactured.

It cannot be, because expanded consciousness within us is born from the willingness to be deeply and sometimes excruciatingly honest with ourselves, and consciousness cannot be anything but authentic.

If the behaviour is not authentic, then consciousness is being compromised.

Hear Pietro’s Remarkable Healership Journey.

Click Here to Hear his interview with Host Bill Mackie of Self-Discovery Radio.

PART 1: Self Discovery Radio Part 1

PART 2: Self Discovery Radio Part 2

Over 1 million people read my blog posts over the last three months. The more readers the greater the chance of my book being published. Please pass this blog post on. Thank you for your support.

Click here to subscribe and receive Pietro’s book blog excerpts when they are published.

Click here to pre-order Pietro’s new book, A Return to Consciousness, and receive a signed, first-edition copy.

You have just read an excerpt from Pietro Abela’s forthcoming book, A Return to Consciousness.

Please pass on this blog and other blogs currently posted on to your friends, family, and those who would benefit from them.

 Please share them on your Facebook and Social Media pages.

I wish you well


One thought on “Discover the Gift of Shame

  1. Truly helpful to read this blog. I have so much respect for the authentic journeys some of us take to improve ourselves, our relationships and our abilities to contribute to our communities. THANK YOU!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *