Do You Have the Ability to Say No?


Protection is a natural outcome of caring, loving relationships.

I love and care for my wife. Out of that love, I will fiercely defend her from unwarranted attacks. whether verbal, physical, or emotional.

I would support a friend who is on the receiving end of unwarranted injustice, because I care for him and his welfare.

I would do the same for my dog.

I would protect anyone with whom I have a loving, caring relationship.

When we are brought up in a family environment in which our needs have not been respected or fully attended to, we emerge from it with an uninformed experience of boundaries, largely because healthy boundaries – the ability to say or convey “no” – were not appropriately modeled…

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Even Hitler was Endowed with a Deep Well of Love


The Authentic Self has been named in previous articles as an intrinsic leader, an inner witness and a provider of both care and boundaries. The essential nature of Authentic Self, however, goes even deeper than this.

The Authentic Self is a deep, bottomless well of love.

This well is central to our being. It is our essence, our core nature.

Religions and Spiritual thinkers have called, and continue to call it our Essence, the Soul: the inner aspect of ourselves that remains pure and untouched.

Despite the sins we have committed, the abuses we have imposed on others, the errors we have made, each one of us harbours an unlimited well of love, untouched and unscarred by life’s battles, with the intrinsic ability to love without limit, without judgment, without condition.

He (or she) who is inconsiderate of others, who steals, who abuses, who commits acts of violence; the bigot who slanders under the flag of prejudice, the murderers who inflict legacies of loss onto the families left behind, the Hitlers’, Stalins’, Saddam Husseins’, the despots past and present, the robbers of dignity through acts of torture and genocide – each is endowed with a deep well of love.

Beneath the acts and intentions of all “evil-doers” resides an ability to love, care, and accept, without judgment prejudice or harmful intention, something that may be hard to hear and believe if you have in any way suffered or been impaired by the atrocities of such people…

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